We live in a very fast paced world. We live in a very connected world. These are two things that can be good, but they can also be very, very bad. We have all heard the saying, “it is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool, than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.” I think we should add something to that phrase, “it is better to keep your mouth closed or not hit send on an e-mail or post on Facebook or Twitter and let people think you are a fool.” Let’s be honest, our first reaction to a difficultly is usually not our best reaction. As an avid sports fan I have seen this play out way too many times on social media. Something in the world of news or politics will come out, and some athlete or owner will react to it on social media only to have to delete the post or apologize for it later. In the news last week was one such instance. Four years ago Lebron James announced he was taking his talents to South Beach. Understandably the owner of the Cleveland Cavaliers, Dan Gilbert, then penned a scathing letter about Lebron. Now we have all written things or thought things in our mind about someone when they hurt us. The problem is Mr. Gilbert then sent the letter out to all Cavalier season ticket holders. If that isn’t bad enough, he then posted it on their official website for all to see. That was four years ago. So now let’s come back to the present. Lebron James decided he wasn’t sure if he wanted to play in Miami anymore, and so he opted out of his contract. That means he was a free agent and could choose where he wanted to play next season. Lebron is from Akron, Ohio and still has a home in Ohio. Here is the best basketball player currently in a position to return to where it all began for him. He could instantly make the team better, and maybe even bring a long overdue championship to the city of Cleveland. Yet Mr. Gilbert’s letter remained on the website. Finally someone decided to get smart really quickly, and they removed the letter, but it is out there and everyone including the player you want to come play for you knows about it. Ultimately, of course it was announced that Lebron was coming back to Cleveland. But one indiscretion, one lapse of judgment almost cost someone very dearly. There are many people on Facebook who have done similar things. They get upset, write a passive aggressive rant, then they make the mistake of hitting the “post” button.
Once you hit that button the train of consequences begins rolling down the track, and there is nothing you can do to stop it. You can hit the delete button all you want, but it is out there. A word of caution to all those on social media who are looking for a job, your potential employers are looking! There have been people fired or not hired because of the information they share. This upsets a lot of people, but you must know that while you have the freedom of speech, employers also have the right to not hire you or to let you go because most contracts have one of two clauses in them. They either have a morals clause in which you agree not to do anything that is immoral and brag about it. Or the other clause is one in which you agree to not do anything that reflects negatively on the company. Simply put, you can’t unring the bell. So how do we make sure we don’t fall into this trap? The Bible says in James 1:19, “let every many be swift to hear, slow to speak (or post), and slow to wrath.” God gave you two ears and one mouth, therefore do twice as much listening as you do talking and that will be a good place to start. Secondly, put a mandatory wait time on yourself before responding to a situation that upsets you. For myself, I try to wait at least 24 hours before responding to something controversial. This wait time allows me to first pray about it. Secondly, it allows me to attempt to look at the other person’s perspective. We often judge something or someone based on how we see things. How many times has someone said something to you that hurt or offended you, but they genuinely meant it in a different way? Perspective is key. Finally, a mandatory wait time allows me to decide is this something I really need to respond to. I saw a marquee a couple of weeks ago that is very applicable here. It said, “you don’t have to enter every fight you are invited to.” Another tactic that might help you not respond inappropriately is to ask yourself this question, is my post, e-mail, or response going to convey genuine love to the person or people who are going to read it? Finally, I would ask yourself is what I’m about to say going to glorify God? If we step back and apply these tactics and James 1:19, I truly believe we will not find ourselves having to apologize nearly as often as we do now. Not only can words hurt us now, but the hurt can linger and cause even more problems down the road.
By His grace and through His strength may we live for Him